Today is Tisha B’Av, the day that commemorates the destruction of both the First and Second Temples in Jerusalem. For me, as many of you know, Tisha B’Av has great personal meaning for me. My mom died on Tisha B’Av. For the past few weeks, I have struggled with how to honor her memory this year. Yes, there is the admirable tradition of donating to charity in the deceased’s name. OK, that’s nice but it just didn’t seem to be enough.
My mom passed away unexpectedly after Andy and I had taken her to The Women in Green’s annual walk around the Old City walls after a reading ofEicha (The Book of Lamentations traditionally read on the eve of Tisha B’Av). I thought that joining the marchers once again would be an appropriate way to honor her. Under a strong police presence, they march along the exterior of Jerusalem’s Old City walls, including the sides that abut Arab neighborhoods in Jerusalem. She loved that walk. While we, with the help of a lot of strangers, pushed her wheelchair up and down the hilly terrain, she marvelled at the Jewish history that surrounded her. But, you can’t go back. Yes, I did participate in the walk last night. But most of the marchers adhered to a political stance far to the right of my own. Though I loved seeing parts of the walls I rarely visit, I left not with a sense of honoring my mom but more a sense of betraying my own political views.
But I think I found a better way to honor her. On Israel Independence Day, I listed, often with some humor, the fun side of life here. Tisha B’Av, with its emphasis on coming together as a people, requires a more serious tone. So to commemorate our national/religious tragedy, as well as my personal sadness, I will try to list, in no particular order, the goodness of the modern State of Israel.
1. Childhood is valued.
Play is not a four-letter word. I don’t think I ‘ve ever walked more than a kilometer in any city or town without spotting at least one playground. They may be small with just a simple swing or slide but they’re ubiquitous. Whenever we have visitors from abroad, they always comment about how refreshing it is to see children playing outside. We nourish our future.
2. Political activism starts early.
I didn’t plan on it but I found myself attending a public Eicha reading in the “Release Gilad Shalit tent” erected outside the prime minister’s residence. The tent was plastered with placards from schools and youth groups expressing wishes for Gilad’s release from his 1,486 days in Gazan captivity. Maybe it’s just because we’re a small country and it’s hard to ignore the political realities of the day. Maybe it’s because youth groups played such a pivotal role in the early development of the country Maybe it’s because parents, faced with limited budgets, find themselves dragging their children to events to eliminate babysitting costs. Or maybe it’s because more than in most places, we want out children to understand that despite the beauty we have created on this sliver of land, we really live under existential threat. I don’t know what the reasons are. But I do know that you’ll always see a remarkable number of children, adolescents and teenagers attending, and often leading, political rallies throughout the country.
3. We don’t use government weakness as an excuse.
Right now, government ministers are fighting over who was and wasn’t treated fairly during the last round of budget discussions. Foreign Minister Avigdor Lieberman’s Yisrael Beiteinu is just the latest party to threaten leaving the coalition unless certain demands are met. Tzipi Livni’s Kadima party seems mostly concerned with determining how best to exploit possible coalition vacancies. But despite a Knesset that is often ripe with scandals, the country is determined to grow and flourish. When the government did not act quickly enough to resettle people fleeing from Hizbullah rockets in the North, people opened up their homes. When Sderot’s economy was paralyzed by Hamas rocket attacks, people travelled from their own communities to shop in Sderot. When theat became to dangerous, people in towns far away ordered food from Sderot take-out stores that was delivered by truck in order to keep Sderot residentws on their feet. This is not meant to be an attack on the Knesset as much as it is an acknowledgement to the Israeli mentality that says, “You’re not going to help? Fine, I’ll do it myself.” We never knew how to take “no” for an answer.
4. A news item in today’s Jerusalem Post does not represent an isolated event.
Two weeks before an attack by a Hamas terror cell which resulted in the death of 39-year-old police sergeant Yehoshua Sofer, “a leader of the cell accompanied his daughter to Hadassah Ein Kerem Hospital in Jerusalem where she underwent surgery to remove an eye tumor. The surgery was funded by an Israeli aid organization.” It’s not the first time and it won’t be the last.
5. We know we don’t have a future if we don’t preserve our past.
My nephew just returned to the U.S. from his first visit to Israel. His first few days here were spent enjoying the beaches of Tel Aviv. After noticing the glass and steel skyscrapers not far away, he commented to his mom, “I thought Israel was older than this.” Well, in more than 3 weeks of touring he discovered not just Israel’s antiquities but how well we preserve them. Andy and I were in Barcelona last summer and we noticed old buildings repaired with material that was convenient and cheap to acquire. It doesn’t work like that here. We’re obsessed with preserving our antiquities; documenting them, cataloguing them and, when necessary, repairing them but not without indicating what was part of the original structure and what represents rebuilding. Great care is taken to preserve the original integrity of our ancient finds. We know that if we can’t appreciate the value of what we had and portray that value to the world, we’ll put our future in jeopardy.
6. We love beauty!
Read the history of eighteenth and nineteenth settlement of the Land of Israel and you’ll read tales of disease, poverty and heartbreak. But you’ll also read about local theater companies, dance troupes and art schools. We understand that building and maintaining a country is not always about the fight but about the ability to enjoy life where you are. Even during times of war and food rationing, we always understood that if we can nourish our soul, we’ll be more willing to build and defend the country. Even Sderot has a film festival. The kibbutz movement gave birth to one of the best dance companies in the country and even small towns offer local art exhibits and symphonettes.
9. We’re “The Little Engine that Could”
We forget that we’re a microscopic dot on the map.
Oh, it’s the 1920s and people are contracting malaria because of the swamps. No problem. We’ll plant eucalyptus trees to drain them. We don’t have them? No problem. We’ll import them from Australia. Remember this was almost 100 years ago and not so easy to do.
Oh we’re in the Middle East but we don’t have oil to support our economy? No problem, we’ll build a high-tech industry that rivals the United States.
Oh, we have too much arid land? No problem. We’ll develop drip irrigation and make the desert bloom. Then we’ll teach the world to do the same.
Oh, we’re on the African continent and we don’t have a safari park? Unacceptable. We’ll build one in Ramat Gan just outside of Tel Aviv.
There are no problems. Only challenges and Israelis thrive on a good challenge.
8. Talk to the Sudanese Refugees working in Eilat hotels.
Israel is a popular destination point for immigrants fleeing national civil war and strife. We don’t always treat them well. Wander the streets of South Tel Aviv and you’ll see that we have a lot of work to do in this area. But we also have a lot to be proud of. Our Eilat hotels are filled with Sudanese refugees trying to start a new life. Yes the work is hard and the wages are low but these people risked capture by the Sudanese and unsympathetic Egyptian governments to reach the only destination in the Middle East where they had any chance of building a new life.
9. We Don’t Wear Rose-Colored Glasses
We may be the most self-critical people I know. While we’re brimming with confidence that we can get the job, any job, done; we’re still always questioning our policies, our value and even our self-worth. How do we relate to the outside world? How to we relate to diaspora Jewry. Are we doing enough for the Ethiopians? How do we forge better ties with the Palestinians? Can we ever live together? How can that be achieved. I’m frustrated by a world that demands more of us than of most other nations but if you step back, nobody demands more of us than ourselves. I don’t always like the popular positions but we are very, if not painfully, aware of our warts.
10. We can laugh at ourselves.
Did you here the one about the polite Israeli? No, there are no polite Israelis. We’re opinionated, nosy, loud, rude and bossy. But nobody knows it better than we do.
Ten is an acceptable number for a list, so I’ll stop here. Mom, you were its inspiration. I hope you feel honored.
Have an easy fast.